Bringing Your Gifts to the Present
What gifts do you have to offer the world that you’ve been hiding behind or pretending are not valuable?
This morning as I sat down to meditate, I opened Insight Timer and came across a mediation titled “Your Gift, Your Purpose.” The description was enticing to me so I chose to tune in.
Dora Kamau (the beautiful oracle), starts the meditation with an inquiry:
Picture giving a friend or loved one a gift—maybe it’s for their birthday or for Christmas or just because. You put so much intention and thought into giving them this special gift. Months later you see them again and realize that they haven’t opened the gift. The gift is sitting there in their home, on their shelf, collecting dust, waiting to be opened. How would that make you feel?
So imagine now when the Creator or the Higher Powers, the powers that be, have given you a gift; a gift that only you possess; that has been given to you—for you and made for you to share with the world, but you keep your gift on the shelf, tucked away waiting to be opened and used.
This opening story or inquiry was very confronting for me. First of all, I have been in a similar situation (as described at the beginning) where I’ve poured my heart into a gift only for it to be left unopened and underappreciated. And the feelings I experienced were hurt and shame over ‘why did I buy this gift in the first place?’. In other words, it didn’t feel good. And second, it caused me to ask, “What are my gifts? Do I have any gifts that I’m not using?”
For most of my life, I felt so out of touch with the use of the word “gifts”. I would hear people speak of Spiritual gifts or talents that have been entrusted specifically to them. Yet, I had a difficult time connecting to that. I thought it was something that only a small subset of people was blessed with.
Even when I left my corporate job after 11 years, I convinced myself that I had no skills. My skills were specific to my industry—which was a total limiting belief, of course. It felt like that though. I had been doing the same job for many years, working on the same projects year after year and really felt like I didn’t have any transferable skills. I was also burned out and had no idea what I wanted to do to create income and sustain my new lifestyle of being a nomad.
I was focused on the skills I had to offer and was not present to any special gifts I might possess.
I’ve picked up various contract jobs over the past 2 years to cover my bills. 95% of the work I’ve supported others in has been writing—blogs, podcast scripts, website copy. And even getting paid to write, I still ignored writing as a gift. It’s a skill I possess.
What is the difference between a skill and a gift? Through my interpretation and life experience, I define them as:
A skill is something that is learned, perfected, and used again and again to develop a level of expertise.
A gift is something that is innate, special, and sometimes not explainable (at least in a concrete form).
I believe that the two can be interchangeable at times. Sometimes we have skills that translate into gifts on a deeper level. For example, for me, writing is a skill. It is a learned practice in school to form sentences and be able to put concepts together. The gift lies in its depth and unconscious application of it. I often wake up in the middle of the night and receive downloads. When sparked with an inspiration (or download as I like to call it), I will grab my phone or journal and start writing. Words will flow through and out of me. The next day I’ll go back and read what I wrote, and I’ll be in awe of what was written. I impress myself sometimes with my own genius (as Gay Hendrick’s refers to in his book The Big Leap).
It wasn’t until I went on my own spiritual journey that I began to discover my intuitive gifts.
If you had asked me at the start of my nomadic journey if I was an intuitive or an empath, I would’ve denied it. Even when I was traveling and experiencing synchronicity after synchronicity, I wasn’t present to having any sort of special gifts. I just assumed that my experiences were working out because of luck or coincidence.
Last year, I took a big leap and signed up for a yearlong coaching program with Darla LeDoux of Sourced Experience called the Beautifully Aligned Collective. At the beginning of the program, Darla posted a survey in our forum asking us to choose which statements resonated with us. I’ll never forget going through the list and feeling aligned with all of them except for number 3:
You are intuitive or empathic, or have even occasionally wondered if you may be psychic. You pick up on things that others don’t, or simply know things even though you didn’t acquire the knowing through logic. You often find yourself knowing what to say to someone that is just want they need to hear, even if you don’t know how you knew to say it.
My coach Julie responded and said that it will be interesting to see how this shows up as I live more from the inner self and become less concerned with the outer self and circumstances. It wasn’t long after that survey that I began to be more aware and present to my intuition. I had a deep connection to my Oracle cards and would pull cards for friends and random travelers on my journeys. I would always pull the exact message they needed to hear, and again I would see it as coincidence rather than it being a gift of mine. As I began to shed more layers and my concern for what others thought of me, I began to embrace my intuitive gifts more and more. I began to receive messages and hits without having to use my cards. My cards became a tool to support my gifts.
It became time for me to take my gift off of the shelf and open it up to the world.
I began offering intuitive sessions earlier this year after the travel design aspect of the business came to a halt due to COVID-19. These sessions are super powerful. It’s an intimate time 1:1 to support others in receiving more clarity around a situation or area of life important to them. I receive so much joy in using my gifts to support others. And every time, I’m amazed and grateful that I can receive money for these gifts. It truly is a co-creation with Spirit to offer these gifts in service to a greater purpose and calling.
The more I lean into my gifts, the more expansion and opportunity is available.
A couple of months ago, I was having a virtual catch-up with my book club. Somehow we started talking about card readings. I mentioned that I offer oracle card readings, and said I’d be happy to do a group session sometime. Everyone agreed and said it sounded like a fun idea. A couple days later, I was on a group call with the Collective. During the call we were guided through a meditation that led us down a path to receiving clarity around our services. In the meditation, if you went through the right door, you’d be led to leading a group, and if you went through the left door you’d be led to doing 1-on-1 work. We weren’t privy to this during the meditation…we were guided to choose a door. I chose the right door. After going through the door, we were lead down a path to an area where a gift was waiting for us. I remember picking up the box and finding a wine cork inside. After the meditation. I put the pieces together—I was leading a group and there would be wine involved. And like that, my inspiration for hosting a card session via Zoom with my book club led to leading a Wine and Oracle Party. This inspiration birthed what I now call Girl’s Night Inward.
None of this would’ve happened if I had kept my gifts tucked away on a shelf waiting to be opened.
This 30-day blog challenge, Intuitive Sessions, Girl’s Night Inward, or future courses I’m working on (soon to be revealed) would never have seen the light of day if I had not accepted my gifts and used them in service to others.
It can be scary to share our gifts with the world. They feel very personal and hold a lot of meaning. We place so much emphasis on them, create added pressure, and attach a lot of meaning to them. We assign an identity to them and fear that others won’t see them as gifts, or will expect for them to be free or of low cost. We get lost in perfectionism and get attached to how we think they should go rather than trusting that it will all unfold as it’s meant to.
Our gifts are an offering from God/Spirit and unique to each individual.
When we approach them as a gift that is being entrusted to us, it releases a lot of the meaning and identity we so often add to them. It allows us to focus on our gifts being of service to others rather than “All about Me”. I’m still learning to release control around how my offerings will look or if/when I will share them with the world. I’m learning to remove my identity around my gifts and instead focus on the people these services and offerings are meant to serve for the highest good of all.
This is not to say that our gifts, offerings, and services are not personal to us. They absolutely are. It’s more so about learning to remove the pressure and limiting beliefs around our gifts not being good enough or worthy of receiving compensation.