Life has an interesting way of teaching us lessons in patience.

When I was a pre-teen I entered into the world of orthodontics. I had a habit of sucking my pointer finger when I was a child, which pushed my teeth outward. At age 12, I got braces. As if being a middle schooler wasn’t awkward enough, getting braces topped it off. Luckily, I wasn’t alone in this stage of life. Many of my classmates and my sister, Lisa had braces alongside me. We at least got to make it a little more fun by changing the colors of our bands to match school colors and create an expression of our own. I had the added element of having a bridge in the roof of my mouth with a metal key that I would turn daily to expand my bite. It goes without saying, but I do not miss those days!

I was a structured kid who followed the rules out of expectation and approval. So naturally, when I got my braces off 2 years later, I made sure to wear my retainer every night. I wanted to be a “good” patient and seek praise from my doctor. For some reason though, when I got to college, I decided that my retainer wasn’t needed anymore. I had been wearing it for 5 years, so surely my teeth were in place by now…

Things shift in life when you let go of the structure holding it in place.

As you guessed, slowly over time, my teeth began to shift. From the outside, there wasn’t a noticeable difference. My teeth were slanted slightly, but it wasn’t anything to fuss about. What did cause a fuss, though, was my bite. I noticed that I was biting the inside of my cheek frequently when eating especially crunchy foods like apples and carrots. It was not enjoyable.

When I was in my late 20’s, I decided to go to the orthodontist to get a consultation about my bite. The first orthodontist I went to said that I would need to get braces again. Orthodontics has come a long way and made many advancements in the 16 years since I had had braces. Invisalign was a newer option that allowed you to move more freely through life without the constraint of monthly checkups or the pain experienced from wire braces. I was excited about this possibility. The orthodontist I visited said I was not a good candidate for Invisalign though, because of my bite. She said it would be a long journey (at least 2 years) and would cost at least $5,000 and not be an effective form of treatment. That was enough for me to say, “No Thank You” and go back on my merry way.

Money is often what stops us from taking action.

In this case, it wasn’t just the money that was stopping me. It was the thought of having to have braces for 2 years. I had plans. I was going to switch jobs, travel the world, and follow my dreams. And that couldn’t be done with braces.

Oh, how clever our minds can be to keep us safe from taking action.

I moved on and went back to living my patterned life. During that gap, my life really began to shake me up. I went through a long period of depression followed by taking inspired action and investing in myself through therapy, transformational programs, and retreats. 2017 was the year that things really began to shift. I dubbed 2017 as My Year of Action. I reached a point of exhaustion by repeating the same patterns, and not taking action towards what I said I wanted. I committed to showing up for myself consistently in ways I hadn’t done prior. It was the year I went on my first international retreat in Guatemala and realized that I was playing it safe in life. I knew after that retreat that it was time for me to quit my job of over a decade and follow my dream of traveling the world.

When I returned home from Guatemala, I raised the bar in showing up for myself inside of my Word of the Year, Action. I went to the dentist and told her that my bite was bothering me. She referred me to an orthodontist whom she highly recommended (Dr. Ortega at White Rock Orthodontics). I immediately booked a consultation. During the consultation, I learned that I was in fact a candidate for Invisalign. Dr. Ortega was confident that I could continue to live my spontaneous lifestyle as a traveler while correcting my bite. He said it would be a long journey and take at least 2 to 2 1/2 years. After all, teeth, especially molars, don’t move overnight.

My fear was screaming at me that this was too long and wouldn’t work, but my intuition knew it was time.

I thought back to my initial orthodontist consult 3-4 years prior. Had I committed to the process then, I would’ve been finished now. I didn’t want to wait another 4 years and be back in this same place with no action. So, on August 22, 2017, I committed to getting Invisalign and going down the path to fixing my bite. I had no idea that by making this commitment I’d also be opening myself up to the longest and most beautiful lesson in patience. After the initial “getting used to having attachments on my teeth”, Invisalign became a part of my lifestyle. I learned to embrace my smile and work my life around appointments. In the past, I would’ve been self-conscious about showing my smile with attachments on my teeth, but I learned that most didn’t even notice it. It became a part of me. I modeled in at least a dozen photoshoots and continued to travel all over the world while stopping back in Dallas every 4 to 5 months to get new trays.

When I hit the 2.5-year mark, I was a little disheartened to learn that my molars still needed more time to move. I received a whole new box of trays starting back to tray 1 of 24. At the rate of changing trays every two weeks, I was looking at least another year. I had made it this far, what was another year? That was a statement I never would’ve embraced prior to this journey. I used to think a month was a long time and that a year was an eternity… oh how naive I was.

It was around this time that I had also started my business and was navigating the world of being my own boss and learning to charge for my services. I thought committing to a multi-year journey with my teeth was challenging. Starting my own business, however, there was no preparing me for this ride.

It’s one thing to enter into something knowing how long it will take; it’s another to enter into something blindly believing it’s going to take off right away.

There are a lot of romantic success stories that entrepreneurs share that suck the newbies in:

• I just had my first $10,000 month!

• I went from broke to rich just by putting myself out there.

• I have more clients than I know what to do with.

• I made $50,000 doing one event.

While these are legit scenarios among many service-based entrepreneurs, it is not a common narrative. What’s missing from these stories is the work behind the scenes and more importantly, the internal work that others rarely see. So, while I celebrate business owners who reach these milestones (and wish to achieve levels like this myself), the way the stories are often shared can be a bit disheartening to those of us who are still building and refining our message and offerings.

If I was to share any wisdom with wannabe or newbie entrepreneurs, it would be to have patience. Take things one step at a time. One day at a time. Trust in the process and learn from those who have been where you want to go.

It was frustrating to hear from my orthodontist that I’d have to wear my Invisalign for another year to a year and a half. I wanted to quit and held back tears in the chair when I learned again that it would be yet another 6 months. But, I was so grateful that he was honest with me and asked me to trust in the process and trust that it would be worth it.

This journey with Invisalign has had so many parallels to running a business.

• Timing is not something that’s always so easily predictable. I learned during this process to let go of linear time and trust in divine timing. There was a deep knowing that the process with Invisalign was here to teach me patience in all areas of my life. It taught me to trust in divine timing with the launch of new offerings and services within my business.

• Don’t compare your timing or results to others’ journeys. I’ve had several friends get Invisalign as adults and the process only took them 6 to 9 months. When I first considered going down the path of orthodontics, I thought it would only take 9 months because that’s what I had heard from so many. But that wasn’t the case for me. My situation was completely different than theirs and would take more time. There was no sense in comparing my timing to theirs because it was unique to me just as theirs was unique to them. The same is with business. These days they say it takes 18-24 months for the average business to make a profit. While some can get there quicker, don’t discount all of the navigating, refining, and planning that takes place in the beginning phases.

• Release attachment to the how and when. When I learned that the process would be longer than 2.5 years with my teeth, I learned to let go of expectations and surrender to the process. I couldn’t force my teeth to move. They had to go at their own pace, just as I’ve had to learn to go at my own pace in business. In 2020, I was set to lead my first international retreat in Spain. This was a big and exciting step for me! And then the pandemic hit. My travels, this retreat, business, and offerings were put on hold. I had to learn to pivot, try on new offerings, and release control.

• Just when you think you’re done, another path appears. I attribute much of my journey to climbing a mountain. The peak can look so close to you as you’re moving towards it. But just when you think you’ve reached the top, another hill or path appears. It’s not as close as it looked. So then you’re faced with a choice, do you keep going? Or, do you turn around and call it done? I could’ve told my orthodontist that I was done when I learned I had another 12 to 18 months to go. But I knew from experience that the journey to the top is worth it. It’s worth it to keep going. The lessons learned along the way are priceless.

• Consistency is key. My teeth would not have moved had I not worn my trays daily and overnight. While I didn’t always follow the recommended wear of 22 hours per day, I never went a day or night without wearing my trays. It was not easy to commit to at first, but after weeks of establishing a routine, I got used to the consistency and began to see results with each new tray and each check-up. I’ve dabbled so much in my business trying on different services and offerings. I’ve not been the best at sending regular newsletters or following what the “experts” say you’re supposed to do to run a successful business. But I have continuously shown up through the good and the hard. I learned that My Why was the foundation (or the trays like with my Invisalign) for everything that I do. And no matter what is happening in my life, as long as I’m holding to My Why, I will continue to show up and be seen.

When you learn to fully surrender and embrace the process, things begin to shift.

At the end of 2020, I learned that I had another 7 to 8 months left with my Invisalign. And I knew there was no point in fighting it. After all, I had already made it this far. So I surrendered and accepted where I was. I remember declaring to my sister, “My business is going to take off when I'm done with my Invisalign.” While I was half-joking, I had this sense that things would shift when I finally learned to let go of control, trust, and be patient.

I wanted to give up many times with my Invisalign. Just like I’ve wanted to give up many times with my business. I’ve gone through the common cycle that many entrepreneurs face of wanting to quit and find a regular job. Yet, something keeps me on this path. There’s a deep knowing within that I’m meant to keep climbing. I’ve come a long way on this journey. The pandemic showed me that I am capable of slowing down and being in one place for a time. It taught me that it’s okay to try on different avenues and embrace all of the many skills I have. It’s taught me to ask for support and open up to receiving. I’ve had to ask many friends and my sister and her husband to support me several times in the last year with money for bills and, at times, food. It has not been easy to ask, but it has been so humbling to receive.

It’s been my greatest lesson in patience. When I finally surrendered to the process, I let go of attachment to the end. At the beginning of June 2021, I went in for what I thought was a normal checkup for my Invisalign to learn that it was actually the day to have my attachments removed and be fitted for a permanent retainer.

Letting go of attachment allowed me to reach the finish line.

And guess what? My declaration has started to show evidence of the payoff from being patient. Last year, I applied for a grant with the Small Business Association (SBA) for Covid relief, and I was denied. I applied for unemployment and again, I was denied. I didn’t earn enough to be considered.

Last week, I went in for a 6-week follow-up for my permanent retainer. It was my final appointment for this leg of the journey. Everyone cheered me on and congratulated me as I walked out of the building. And at that moment, I knew. Things finally were shifting.

I reapplied several weeks ago for an EIDL Covid Relief grant through the SBA. Monday, I woke up to find a generous sum of money in my account.

While I did receive a large portion of money overnight, the work that went into being patient, trusting, and surrendering to the process did not happen overnight.

I wasn’t ready to get orthodontics when I first went in for a consultation. I was meant to go on this 4-year journey at this time in my life. And the same is with the grant money. Had I gotten the money last year when I first applied, I would’ve used it to escape rather than face my pain.

Patience is a beautiful teacher and one of the most challenging lessons we will ever learn.

1. Where in your life are you afraid to start out of fear of how long the process will take?

2. Where in your life are you wanting to speed up the process to be done rather than soak in the journey?

3. Where in your life are you wanting to quit because it’s gotten too hard or you simply can’t wait any longer?

4. Where in your life are you comparing your timing and your journey to others’ stories rather than embracing your pace?

I invite you to reflect on these questions and see what arises. And if you find yourself desiring support, reach out to me. I created a new customized program to support you with where you are now that is designed to fit how you best operate. Send me a message or schedule a curiosity call to learn more.