As I near the completion of my 30-day (ish) blog challenge, I find myself filled with peace and gratitude. And, of course, satisfaction over the act of writing daily and showing up for the challenge. It’s more than the challenge though. It’s the peace and gratitude I’ve gained through owning and accepting who I am with love.
I’ve learned throughout this process and this year to tune inward and show up for myself first.
Read MoreI’ve known most of my life that there was something different about me. I sense, see, and feel things.
From a young age, I thought something was wrong with me. I felt like I didn’t belong or fit in with others. I tried so hard to find acceptance and approval from my family, friends, teachers…pretty much everyone. I thought if enough people liked me then I would be okay, and that these strange sensations and mood swings would go away. Yet, how much people liked me didn’t really matter. It wasn’t about them; it was my own internal battle. I would notice my energy shift. One minute I’d be laughing and having a good time and the next I’d be uncomfortable and wanting a way out. The shifts never made sense to me. I thought it there was something wrong that couldn’t be fixed. I had no idea that these sensations and shifts in energy were part of my Human Design.
Read More“That’s your ‘One Day’ story,” my therapist said as she looked across the room at me.
“My what?” I asked as I stared at her blankly.
“Your ‘One Day’ story. You know the ‘One day I’m going to paint my room this color.’ ‘One day I’m going to save money to follow my dreams.’ ‘One day I’m going to open my heart and let someone in.’ It’s the story you keep telling yourself that one day you’re going to do. Yet, you keep telling the story rather than actually doing anything to make it come true.”
Read More“Why are they burning the crops?” I asked our guide as we were driving through the Serengeti National Park. “They burn the crops to breathe new life into the earth. The ash creates minerals that provide the soil with rich nutrients to produce new crops in the next season.”
In the summer of 2016, I went the trip of a lifetime with my two travel buddies on a safari in the Serengeti National Park in Tanzania. We came during the dry season which was the perfect time to see wildlife from afar and up close. This was also the season in which they burned the crops to create new life.
Fires blaze to burn off the old to create new, sustainable life.
Read MoreIn this particular message, the card is referring to receiving love and nourishment from the universe. When I think of nourishment, I think of a loving mother holding her baby and caring for its every need. The child is loved, nourished, and provided for. As adults, it’s not so easy to allow this type of love and nourishment into our lives. At least, that’s the case for me.
Read More2020 has been an extremely difficult and unexpected year for the entire world. For me personally, there’s been a lot of change, heartbreak, loss, and regret. As a nomad, I went from the freedom of traveling the world to being confined to one spot; in February, I ended a relationship with a man that I love and have had to deal with the regret and heartbreak from that decision; and then with COVID and all of the anti-racism movements happening, my system was in overload. After my cousin died, it was the final straw for my emotional well-being. I found myself distant from my friends and family and unable to maintain healthy boundaries or communication.
I knew it was time for me to go inward and tune out for a bit.
Read MoreBeing self-employed and an entrepreneur is one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done. When I was working for a company, I had a boss and a team backing me. They believed in me enough to hire me and keep me around. I remember when I left my career after 11 years feeling as if I had no skills. Obviously this isn’t true, but it’s what my ego (the noise in my head) was wanting to tell me. I’ve been afraid to put myself fully out there. I’ve had to deal with conversations around money and worth and how I charge for my services. I’ve had to learn to not take things personally and know that when someone gives me a “No”, it’s not me. Not everyone is going to be the right fit.
Read MoreWhile I did not get what I wanted, I can now see the beauty in not getting it at this time. Had I gotten it, I may not have been present to these hard learned lessons. I wouldn’t have allowed myself the space to feel and be with my thoughts and emotions. And nothing is lost. I will continue with my project and pursue other ways to fund it.
Read MoreAs children, we all go through learning what it is to tell the truth and face consequences when we choose not to. It’s an innate fear that we go through as human beings. Something happens and we are afraid to own it. It’s easier to pretend or lie than to tell the truth. Cue the Full House music and Danny telling Michelle that if she had just come forward and said what she did, she wouldn’t have been in trouble.
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